Tuesday, December 15

A few fears...*GASP*

So...since being diagnosed i do have some fears.
  • FALLING - this actually is one of my biggest fears; what if I fall and hurt myself; sometimes i am so stiff and have little balance - did I mention that i live in a 3 story townhouse?  I have to contend with 32 steps everyday!  When I do go into the office, I work downtown on Peachtree St.  For those of u who don't know, Peachtree is the Frederick St of Atlanta.  i am so afraid of falling on Peachtree St, that i feel ill just thinking about it!
True story: I was in Form 3 (13/14 years old) and my mother FINALLY said "ok, u can take maxi - (public transport; there are no school buses in Trinidad; we either took public transportation OR ur parents took u back and forth - so she finally let me take public transport) home after school." I was so excited; i get to walk down Frederick St, lime in Colsort Mall etc (close ur eyes Mummy) and take taxi! WOOHOO!! lime now start!! Well halfway down the street, i fell!!! Yup - my bookbag went 1 way, my binder a next, I was MORTIFIED!!!! how? How d hell did that happen??? To this day,OB(my father) gives me a hard time about it - in fact the other day he told me that he was somewhere and somebody fell up ahead. He said he looked to see if it was me!

  • Not being able to walk - probably a close 2nd.  I know that this is also not the end of the world, but it is what it is...
  • Pain; I can't say this enuf - I am LUCKY; these days i have no pain
  • The unknown - the thing about MS is that it affects people differently.  At any given time, who knows what the disease may have in store for me
  •  Falling and not being able to get up
  • Holding babies - esp if I'm standing up; suppose i am holding 1 and i fall!
  • Walking between cars in a parking lot; this probably is not so much a fear as something i dislike doing - esp when 1 of the cars is not mine...suppose i lose my balance and end up falling/leaning on 1 of the cars!
  • Wearing heels...yes because u guessed it - i WILL break my ass (fall)
Maybe one day, i will overcome these fears - who knows, but until then I:
  • Stay away from the babies - unless i'm sitting down
  • Cross the street very carefully only at the crosswalk and ALWAYS wait for the light (no guarantee, but worth a shot)
  • Wear slippers & sneakers almost everywhere i go; helps me to be sure footed
I guess this goes back to my knowing my limitations and not putting myself in situations that i can't handle, but...

u know what they say about the best laid plans...


  1. You probably have now idea how I look forward to your blogs and the comments that all your crazy friends make, btw, I'm not one of the crazy ones. I'm simply lovin it and it's teaching me not to complain about anything. Keep it up your change people through your blog!

  2. "stay away from the babies"... lol! i love it!

  3. Angelique, i would like to point out that u make the most comments, so that means that U ARE 1 of the crazy ones!


  4. LOL...I am wiping away tears....ok so I guess I will layy off the slippers thing...even though yuh want to wear it when is -1 outside...we could negotiate