AARRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!

I hate Multiple Sclerosis! 

There!  I've said it loud and proud!!  so i went to my neuro on Tuesday and what did he tell me?  more of the same bullshit "Tysabri needs at least 6 months before we start seeing any effects", "we have to give it time".  He also said that treating the MS is about trying to find that balance - finding the right drugs to help but not so much that the side effects have u going out of ur mind, exercising but not so much that u get too hot and start to overheat and feel terrible, eating well but not so much that you end up depriving ur body of essential nutrients that it needs - WTF!??!  is it really all about trial and error???  ARGH!!!!

Anyhoo, so on that note, i've added yet another small white pill to my collection.  this one is even more powerful than the others because it's 4mg and i only am taking 1/2 - and again, i was the drowsiest i've ever been in my life after i took the first one.  The difference with this drowsiness was that it only lasted about 3 hrs not the entire day like the last time - go figure.  I hope that this passes soon because it's a drowsy, drunken feeling that I'd rather not experience again (the last time i was only drowsy the 1st day).  This one is also for Spasticity which is what he suspects is causing my walking problems these days.  Good news/bad news.  Hopefully I won't be as stiff as I have been but not so much that my legs feel like jelly!  Shit, we all know what that means - more falling for me - WHOOHOO!!!

I hate having MS!  I've said it again - loud and proud.  what i hate about it the most is all the unknowns:

• Don't know what causes it
• Don't know what cures it
• Don't know y u have it
• Don't know what course it will take/how it will affect you
• Don't know how long you will experience what you are going thru right now   

the list can go on...and on and on.

Allright, I'm off my soapbox now :-)